MURPHY'S LAWS OF COMBAT

  1. If the enemy is in range, so are you

  2. Your weapon was made by the lowest bidder

  3. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you

  4. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush

  5. If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid

  6. Make it tough for the enemy to get in, and you can't get out

  7. If you're short of everything except the enemy, you're in combat

  8. Anything you do can get you shot, including doing nothing

  9. Incoming fire has the right of way

  10. The only thing more accurate than incoming fire is incoming friendly fire

  11. If your plan works, the enemy was probably low on ammo

  12. The enemy diversion you're ignoring is the main attack

  13. The most dangerous weapon in the enemy's arsenal is one of your own second lieutenants carrying a map and compass

  14. All five-second grenade fuses burn down in three seconds

  15. No plan survives the first contact intact

  16. If you're forward of your position the artillery will fall short

  17. The important things are always simple

  18. The easy way is always mined

  19. Radios fail as soon as you need fire support

  20. When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy

  21. No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection

  22. Beer math is simple: 37 men times two beers each equals 49 cases

  23. Body count math is simple: two hostile bodies plus one probable plus two pigs equals 37 enemies KIA

  24. Things that must be together to work usually can't be shipped together

  25. Tracers work both ways

  26. Recoilless rifles aren't

  27. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you'll have more than your fair share of objectives to take

  28. When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right

  29. Professional soldiers are predictable

  30. The world is full of amateurs

[ HOME | Laughs List | Humour Page | More Humour | Even More Humour ]
[ Drop me a note | Give me feedback | Sign My GuestBook | Page Me ]

This page created and maintained by:
Kuah Wee Khai, khai@earthling.net

Copyright © 1996