Letter from home


             TO:       Kentucky Son
              
             FROM:     Kentucky Mom
              
              
             Dear Son,
              
             I'm writing this slow cause I know you can't read fast.
              
                  We don't live where we did when you left.  Your dad
             read in the paper where most accidents happen within 20
             miles of home, so we moved.  I won't be able to send you the
             address as the last Kentucky family that lived here took the
             number with them for their next house so they would not have
             to change their address.
              
                  This place has a washing machine.  The first day I put
             four shirts in it, pulled the chain and haven't seen 'em
             since.
              
                  It only rained twice this week, three days the first
             time and four days the second time.
              
                  The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt Sue said
             it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with them
             heavy buttons.  So we cut them off and put them in the
             pockets.
              
                  We got a bill from the funeral home; said if we don't
             make the last payment on Grandma's funeral; up she comes.
              
                  About your father, he has a lovely new job.  He has
             over 500 men under him.  He is cutting grass at the
             cemetery.
              
             About your sister, she had a baby this morning.  I haven't
             found out whether it is a boy or a girl, so I don't know if
             you are an aunt or and uncle.
              
             Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat.  Some men tried to
             pull him out, but he fought them off playfully, so he
             drowned.  We cremated him, he burned for 3 days.
              
             Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pickup.  One
             was driving, the other two were in the back.  The driver got
             out, he rolled down the window and swam to safety.  The
             other two drowned.  They couldn't get the tailgate down.
              
             Not much more news this time.  Nothing much has happened.
              
             Write more often.
              
                                                     Love, Mom
             


             P.S.  I was going to send you some money, but the envelope
             was already sealed.


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